Tuesday, January 23, 2007

I want to say...

...that I'm doing surprisingly well without the meds. It's been about three weeks since the last time I had any medication, and that was after a few months of tapering off. And, despite a few occasional spells of crankiness and dizziness/drowsiness (a couple of the lovely physical side-effects of withdrawal) I feel good. Actually, I feel great, because not only am I not going crazy, but I also feel so mentally energized by how well this is going and the prospect that I might actually be ok without the pills.

I want to say all this...but if I do something might prove me wrong.

So I'm only pretending to say it for now, or maybe hypothesizing. The jury is still out.

On a different topic, today is one of my favorite days of the year: Oscar nominations day! Honestly, I truly believed they were next Tuesday, but this is even better. So far, I've only seen one of the best picture nominees, Little Miss Sunshine. I watched that yesterday for the first time, and man was it good. I must buy this DVD so I can watch it all the time. I loved it. Steve Carell was probably my favorite character, but only as a close second to Alan Arkin. The conversation/"advice" session between him and Dwayne in the car was priceless. And, god, the final scene at the pageant was genius...great characterization and also a gem of a stab at the beauty pageant culture. Never thought a striptease could be so funny and sweet. I hope this wins.

But then I still haven't seen the other best pic nominees, or most of the nominees in all categories. I have quite a task ahead of me this next month: lots of movies to watch before the awards.

Finally, I have to brag for a moment. A year ago, I began working with a group of other writers and/or grad students on an upcoming issue of Natural Bridge, the literary journal published by the University of Missouri-St. Louis. The issue we worked on contains a special section on responding to women writers, but the entire issue--not just the special section--is excellent. I was the non-fiction section editor, which meant I weeded through the many essay submissions from across the country and even other parts of the world, chose several finalists, and we critiqued and debated those finalists as a group. I am so proud of the essays we agreed on, as there were times when I had to fight for my choices and defend my stance to accept or leave out certain pieces. The respective fiction and poetry section editors--my colleagues on this issue--did the same with those submissions, and I am sure feel the same pride I now feel. Finally, a year later, our issue is out. I received my two copies of the journal in the mail last week; they are beautiful!

It pains me that there are launch parties and readings in St. Louis these next couple weeks to which several of the authors are traveling so they may read from their contributions to Natural Bridge, and I can't be there. It's ok; I still had a hand in this and couldn't be happier with the way it turned out.


At January 24, 2007 1:26 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

i think you should go to st.louis and attend some of the parties. for having such a part of it, it would be nice to celebrate and visit with old friends.

also glad that your feeling better. how long were you dizzy and tired for?

At January 24, 2007 3:12 PM, Blogger Heather said...

I'd love to go, but I have to work. It's too late to request these days off. Also, a flight and all other travel expenses would add up to more than I would want to spend on a trip to St. Louis at this point.

The physical side effects lasted, off and on, for a few weeks as I decreased my dose and then stopped completely. Once in a while, I still feel touches of the dizziness or drowsiness. But that is mostly gone and will be completely gone eventually.


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