Sunday, February 11, 2007

what kind of latte was that?

Some guy went ballistic on me yesterday and accused starbucks employees of urinating in the coffee. According to him, this is common practice throughout the company, and he’s "just sick of it, damn it.” This came right before having a temper tantrum about getting the wrong drink and then throwing his change at me. Also, he didn’t actually get the wrong drink. He ordered an Americano, apparently not understanding what it is (espresso and water), and when the barista handed it to him, he flipped out because he thought that when she added the hot water, she was cheating him out of coffee, when in reality water is part of the recipe.

One of our faithful, offbeat and hilarious regular customers told me that this guy had been wandering around the café telling everyone to make sure we hadn’t peed in their coffee, as he assured them this is common practice throughout the company. Most people ignored him. The funny thing about it, to me, is that this insane man seemed to really believe we do this, and yet there he was ordering a drink from us anyway.

Actually, the funniest part is how he imagines we add this special ingredient. Evidently, he told people that we sneak off into the bathroom for each individual beverage we make. Because were we to actually do something this horrendous, we surely wouldn't go the more efficient route and take care of it an entire batch at a time. Instead, we'd take turns sneaking off to the bathroom, one barista/one drink at a time. So he's not just a disgusting, delusional weirdo, but he's also not so bright.

Not that anyone took this lunatic seriously. Everyone kept right on drinking. I was about to call security to have him removed when he removed himself.

Truly, we do not pee in the coffee. You have my word on this.

On a much better note…only three days until my trip. Three days! Before the sun rises on Thursday, my plane will be in the air and my shoulders will finally begin to relax as I leave behind the ugly stress that has somehow found its way into my life.


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